Christmas 2009

“Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance.To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect.” -Oren Arnold

These are the best gifts of all. What is amazing is that they are recession proof, they are timeless, and they all come on everyones size. Happy Holidays, everyone.

I live life to the fullest

and all of those other cliche sounding adages that I hear people say. Last week I took the old adage by the horns and went skydiving. According to my mother, I seem to have some sinister plot to give her a heart attack (lol). So what in the world would possess me to leap out of a perfectly good airplane at 14,250 feet? Simply, I did it because I could. I did it because I've always been inspired by people who have lived their life without regrets. People who do not have lives filled with a long list of "could'ves, would'ves, should'ves". Now you may say (and justifiably so), ILP, you don't have to skydive to live life to the fullest. My response (besides you're right) would be that skydiving is representative of all of the opportunities that life has to offer and the speed at which those opportunities can fly by.

Since my jump I have been bombarded with questions, primarily, "What was going through your mind as you were coming down?" Interestingly enough...nothing was going through my mind. I was simply in the moment. I simply was. What an incredible lesson about how one should live. How ironic that for me, it took something as extreme as a jump to teach me one of life's true cornerstones.

Since I've landed...I haven't been able to stop humming Tim McGraw's old tune. Right now the lyrics are my life's anthem. Enjoy.

Live Like You Were Dyin'

He said: "I was in my early forties,"With a lot of life before me,"An' a moment came that stopped me on a dime."I spent most of the next days,"Looking at the x-rays,"An' talking 'bout the options an' talkin’ ‘bout sweet time."I asked him when it sank in,That this might really be the real end?How’s it hit you when you get that kind of news?Man whatcha do? An' he said: "I went sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu."And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,"And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying."An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,"To live like you were dyin'." He said "I was finally the husband,"That most the time I wasn’t."An' I became a friend a friend would like to have."And all of a sudden goin' fishin’,"Wasn’t such an imposition,"And I went three times that year I lost my Dad."Well, I finally read the Good Book,"And I took a good long hard look,"At what I'd do if I could do it all again,"And then: "I went sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu."And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,"And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying."An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,"To live like you were dyin'." Like tomorrow was a gift,And you got eternity,To think about what you’d do with it.An' what did you do with it?An' what can I do with it?An' what would I do with it? "Sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu."And then I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,"And I watched Blue Eagle as it was flyin'."An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,"To live like you were dyin'." "To live like you were dyin'.""To live like you were dyin'.""To live like you were dyin'.""To live like you were dyin'."

The Old, the sick and the sudden

I am sure that we have all heard that old adage that bad things happen in 3's. Well death, depending on how you look at it, is one of those bad things. The week of June 22, 2009 was an incredible example. Monday began with the death of Ed McMahon. At the time of his death he was 89 years old. Thursday the world woke up to the news that actress Farrah Fawcett had lost her 4 year battle with cancer. The world went to bed in shock at the sudden death of Michael Jackson.

These deaths have sent me into reminiscence mode. I grew up with these 3 souls having a tremendous impact on me. As a kid, I didn't get to watch much television, so it was a treat to be able to sneak late at night and watch the antics of Johnney Carson. I waited with baited breath to see how my ladies from 'Charlie's Angels' were going to crack the next case. I will admit that I wanted to be Sabrina Duncan (played by Kate Jackson). I thought she was brilliant. Who didn't have a favorite Michael Jackson song?

As the weeks have passed on since their deaths, I have had to take stock and examine each of their legacies. What gift has each person left to make this world a better place? I can only speak for me.

Ed McMahon has left me with the importance of laughter. One cant sleep on the fact that laughter is an integral part of life. I wish that more people would do it. Farrah Fawcett helped to teach me that women are more than just a pretty face. She taught me that we are smart, we are talented, we are multi-faceted, we are independent, we are strong, we are brave, and most importantly...we are love.

Michael Jackson taught me that God's gift to the world is music. I don't think that anyone has lived or will ever live that understood that better than he did. He had the ability to unite all people, all races, all religions...simply by sharing God's gift. It was all about the music.

I remember when I was a kid, my cousin Pebbles (Lisa) was beginning to take a deeper walk with God. To demonstrate to us mere mortals that she was serious about her new path, she decided that she was going to give up all of her love of "worldly music" including her almost obsessive love (my opinion) for Michael Jackson. I think most of us were happy for her new life, even if it was just to see her take those humongous Michael Jackson posters down from her wall. Pebble's took a giant step in her faith shortly after PYT began playing in regular rotation on the radio. I remember walking into her bedroom and watching her dance and sing... "I want to love you. PYT...Pretty Young Thing...And I'll take you there." She explained that she heard it and just couldn't help herself. There was just something about the music. She understood that God showed his love in every one of his creatures.

It was always funny when I heard folks that were older than me say, "Ya'll youngins dont know this or that...I ain't now like it was back then." The world lost some great people the week that was June 22, 2009. I'll have a good time telling the "young folks" what they've missed.

What I learned from the Inaugural Maryland Half Marathon

The morning of Sunday, May 31, 2009 began cold and damp and with plenty of rain. I showed up to the Maryland State Fairgrounds in Timonium and sat in my car contemplating whether to go back home and skip the 13.1 mile run that I had committed to run. I sat in my car and wondered to myself, “Why do you even need to run anyway?” Honestly, the answer was not as simple as my needing to keep my word. Months of training wasn’t swaying my feelings either. Running for the cause (the Greenebaum Cancer Center) was doing nada. While watching two runners run back and forth doing warm-ups and seeing race volunteers direct the crowds, a woman in the vehicle next to mine was trying to get my attention. I rolled my window down and she asked, “Do you know if the staging area is where all those people are headed?” I didn’t know, but answered, “Yes, I believe so.” The woman thanked me and then got out of the car. I decided that even though it was raining I should probably get a move one and at least see what was happening in the area where everyone was gathering.

I arrived in the staging area (thank God I was correct) and turned on my IPOD, being able to tune out all the pre run chatter helped calm my nerves. Questions began to swirl in my head. Would I have to run in the rain? Was the course difficult? Would I make my time goal (which for me was under 2:12:24)? What if I couldn’t finish? Then I noticed that the woman from the parking lot was standing next to me. “They just blew the rallying horn. I guess that means things are going to start soon?” I introduced myself and then we began to walk towards the start line. Kim (parking lot woman’s name) and I began talking about what we both heard about the course. We compared training stories. And then Kim said, “This is my first race, ever. I am worried that I won’t be able to finish.”

Well my experience spirit took over, which in itself is hilarious (the Maryland Half was going to be only the 2nd organized half marathon that I had registered). I advised: Don’t let the energy from the crowd take you out too fast. Take advantage of the water stops. Take the race one mile at a time. I even told her how I dedicate each mile to think about something different. Have a plan when you go through the water stops. Get to the finish. Kim seemed to be taking in all of my tips and then she asked, “Why are you running?”

I didn’t get to answer her because the start crowd began to move and then we were off. I lost Kim shortly after mile one. Miles 2-3 were alright. I loved the course between miles 4-5. Running on the 2 lane road was kind of cool. I think the covering of the trees added to the effect. I was mesmerized by the man I saw shortly after the split. He decided he was going to do his 13.1 while skipping rope. I met up with Kim again at the overlap at mile 7. She was looking good. I cursed the course organizers for all of mile 8. Why they felt a hill at that point was a good idea I couldn’t figure out. The Little Red Devils at mile 9 provided the comic relief. I had to dig really deep, so that I could navigate the hill at mile 11. I wish I had gotten the name of the race volunteer, so I could thank her personally for her encouraging words. I was wearing a hat that said, “I run so that I can drink wine.” The race volunteer reminded me that I had a bottle of MD wine chilling at home. I was stoked when I saw the 12 mile marker. As I crossed the finish line and heard the announcer say my name, it hit me.

I run because I can. I run because nothing mimics life more closely. I run because nothing is more satisfying than coming across the finish line knowing that you’ve done it. You’ve finished. My icing on the cake was my finishing time of 2:10:52.

Lying is done with words and also with silence.

I have recently adopted the above quote. Adrienne Rich has never said a truer set of words. It takes my breath away when I come across individuals that do not consider silence a form of deception. I recently ended a conversation with a 40 year old gentleman. I use the word gentleman ONLY for the purposes of this posting because calling him a lyin' Bastard would be to good...sorry I digress. This gentleman was perplexed as to why I kept calling him a liar. He wanted to know what exactly he had said that would classify him as a liar.

We went back and forth for several rounds and finally broke it down like this:
1. When you say something that isn't true. Lie.
2. When you say something that leads another to believe something that isn't true. Lie.
3. When you tell just enough of the truth to get by. Lie.
4. When you you tell half and leave off half. Lie.
5. When you say nothing at all. Lie.
6. When you tell yourself something that isn't true. Damned sad lie.

I finally let the 40 year old lyin' bastard...urr...I mean gentleman that numbers 1-5 all ooze deceit. The 40 year old got me when he asked if #6 wasn't deceitful as well (did I mention he was a sarcastic lyin' bastard?). I am still mulling that one over. Can one be deceitful with oneself?

The bottom line for me isn't the lie. It isn't what I find so offensive. It is the deception that is the most egregious.

On the 5th of May

I have come to understand that this world has dreamers, realists and the people that are a hybrid of both. I am a realist who has a friend that is a dreamer.

Sometimes...it is so difficult for me to have a conversation with her. Sigh.

The Power of the Written Word

I've always been the type of person that believed that if you wrote down your thoughts and desires then there was live documentation (in black and white) for you to refer to if you needed it. The live documentation was there to hold me accountable, to remind me, to help me track my progress or lack there of. As a result, I have To Do Lists, Affirmation Sticky Notes, Blogs, Journals, and the various random doodling.

Usually when I write it down, I actually realize what is written there. No matter the task or dream, if I write it down, then I do it. My written words come to fruition. I've written down financial goals, written down my educational goals, I write down my running goals. Guess what? I realize those too. This week, for the first time, I kept a food journal. I've been writting down my goals this week. I've been writting down what I plan to eat (and what I want to avoid). Yup, so far so good.

So tonight, it has occurred to me that I should address the relationship area of my life. And no, I am not being ridiculous. It stands to reason, I write everything else down. So here goes:

I want a real man. I want a man that is emotionally available. One that loves music. One that loves art. He must love God and respect nature and the gifts it has to offer. He should speak with his heart. He should love me, respect me, challenge and interest me. He must be a man of integrity and honor.

It is now time for me to get to work.

25 More Random Things

On my first day of Spring Break, I find myself sick as a dog. Since I am bed ridden anyway, I've decided to share some random thoughts. These are not in any particular order.


1. Technology scares me. It really does, seriously. Take this Facebook account for instance….I only have it because of a class requirement.

2. I believe that ALL things have a season. Life, friends, jobs, relationships, clothes, etc.…enjoy what you can, learn what you are supposed to learn, and move on when it is done.

3. Even though she died back in 1999, it is still sometimes incomprehensible to me that my cousin Lisa is dead. I hope that she is proud of all me.

4. I am a gypsy at my core. I am at home anywhere on this planet.

5. Teaching was the absolute last thing I thought I would be doing for a career. I only began teaching while waiting for the Foreign Service to place me.

6. Monday, January 6, 2006 and running have saved my life. Literally.

7. I don’t believe in Political Correctness. I think it has abused Truth. However, I still hold out hope that Truth will prevail.

8. The first book I ever read from cover to cover was Gone With the Wind. I read the sequel Scarlet…what a let down.

9. I do own an IPOD (someone had to set it up for me though) and I have everyone from Conway Twitty to TPain loaded in it.

10. I have friends that have interesting careers. I know an ice trucker, a CEO of a bank, fitness trainers, foreign service workers, writers, archivists, reporters, pilots, a taste tester, exotic dancers, bartenders, fashion designers, professional athletes, private investigators, personal assistants to famous/wealthy people, numerous chefs, Peace Corps workers, actor, recording artists, ministers, a jeweler, a hand and foot model (not the same people, btw), a few regular models. I could go on, but I’ve made my point.

11. Closed Mind People (People that “Don’t like this/that/him/her/them/it” for no other reason other than mere existence), really, really tick me off.

12. I believe that people have the time to do what they desire to do. Period.

13. I am a principled person.

14. I despise winter, but understand its necessity in the cycle of things.

15. I am jealous of artistic people in general. I wish that I could express myself in the ways that they do.

16. I once spent an entire paycheck on a purse and a pair of shoes.

17. I get a kick out of seeing my students having an “Aha! Moment”. It never ever gets old.

18. The concept of rewarding people for doing things that they are supposed to do is the saddest practice I have ever seen.

19. I am most at peace when I am near water. I sometimes turn on the faucet and watch the water run. Lately, since I have been trying to be less wasteful of the world’s resources, I have started the practice of filling a large bucket with water and then using it to clean things. Yeah, you got it…the dipping my hands in water thingy.

20. I am an English teacher that happens to be the worst speller known to man.

21. I cried when I left Brazil at the end of last summer. I really, really considered not boarding my flight back to the US.

22. If one got a passport stamped for travel within the US, my passport would be stamped the most for Las Vegas, Nevada. Yeah, I don’t get this one either. I’ve been to Las Vegas so many times now that visits have begun to blend together.

23. Sometimes people don’t get what they deserve.

24. It is in part of because of charity that I am where I am today. I am charitable one, to remind myself of it and two, to hopefully bless someone else.

25. My mom and my aunt are my heroes.

Live & Learn, Learn & Live.

I promised myself that if and when I ever went back to school that it would be for myself and it would be for topics that I cared about. Tonight I am sitting in a course called Flash CS3. Tonight (at 9:40 pm mind you and the class began at 6 pm) I am wondering if I really care about this topic. I really am trying not to second guess my decision.

Aye yie, yie!

That is all.

So let it be written, so let it be done.

In 2:12 flat! It wasn't to long ago that I informed all one of you out there that reads this blog (lol)that I had signed up to do one more again. And so this past weekend the stars aligned perfectly for me to safely travel to Virginia Beach, Va for the Yuengling Shamrock Marathon, Half Marathon and 8K. What a great weekend! Not only was I impressed with my time (of which I don't believe I could have done any better), but I was impressed with the graciousness of the people. I was able to laugh a lot and relax. I was even able to drink champagne at the finish line (sorry sponsors).

Weirdest moment: Seeing a beer station at miles 3 and 9.
Most hilarious road signage: "Baseball is wrong....a man with 4 balls cannot walk."
Odd restaurant menu offering: Ham Chunks
Most memorable moment: Too many to count
Most inspirational moment: My tears of triumph at the finish line.

Rewarding moment: Champagne and live music after the race.

It was suggested that Virginia Beach become a yearly tradition. I have to say that I agree. Man...great friends, great laughs, great race....equals awesome memories.

Btw: The picture of is of me 5 seconds before crossing the finish line.

In Memory of Mercedes "Ce-Ce" Fondren

Good Night

“You were a cheerleader and you can dance?”
giggle
Your laugh was infectious
It matched your quirky voice and style.

“Are you gonna miss me when I'm gone?’
frowny face
That question everyone asks at some point
We didn’t know that we’d have to eventually answer it.

“Are you sad? You look sad?”
affirmative head nod
We liked that you could always tell
You always seemed to just know.

“Who's gonna have the last laugh?”
a cunning winking eye
We all did because we knew you.
The pleasure was certainly ours, lady.

“Wanna see what I've been working on?”
display a belly with child
Another one in the world like you would’ve been awesome.
But God already knew that mankind wouldn’t appreciate it.


Thank you Ce-Ce
You made us keep our promise
We are all getting together again.

Sleep well dear, sweet lady.
We'll see you soon.

Veria

I've spent the last few weeks catching up to the past. I got a new cell phone and a new internet, cable and phone provider. I am sure that I am not saving any money with all of these upgrades that I performed, but I have discovered a little gem. I think my new muse is worth all the money I've spent afterall.

So lady and gentlema...eerr, ladies, let me introduce: Veria.

More information can be found here... http://www.veria.com/

Enjoy.

Barack-sploitation

They say that the wheels of commercialism will turn no matter what. In this economy I would've been hard pressed to find anyone making any money. Then Barack Obama was sworn in as America's 44th President. I braved the meticulously cold weather on Tuesday and went to DC, so that I could say that I was a part of history. I was awestruck by two things: 1) how very nice and well behaved everyone was. DC police reported that not one of the 2 million people that was reported to be in DC that day was arrested. 2) I was dumb founded by the amount of Obama gear that people were selling. Let's see...I saw:

1. Obama Coins
2. Obama hats, tshirts, socks, shirts, shorts, and underwear (yeah...figure that out)
3. Obama blankets and throws
4. Obama lanyards and key chains
5. Obama mugs, glasses, shot glasses
6. Obama bobble head dolls
7. Obama Chiahead
8. Obama stationary, pens, pencils
9. Obama bumper stickers
10. Obama clocks, wall hangings, paintings
11. Obama 44 Sneakers (oh, by the way...they lit up)
12. Obama sunglasses
13. Obama dog collars

14. Obama buttons

15. Obama golf balls

16. Obama paperweights

But by far the worst offending Obama items are the Sasha & Malia dolls put out by Ty. Of course Ty came out with a statement that said that the dolls had nothing to do with the two sisters and that the release of the dolls on Inauguration night was pure coincidence. Each doll is $9.99.

I guess someone has to make money.

3 Places to See Before You Die

Everyone who knows me and has been paying attention knows that I LOVE to travel. God's earth is so big and so beautiful. I think I was put here to see as much of it as I can.

It is a shame that I haven't quite figured out how to see the planet and eat at the same time, so I do the best that I can. The best I can do for 2009 is to enjoy the Christmas present I bought for myself. I bought a 1000 Places to See Before You Die Desk Calendar. I get to see a wonderful and different local each day. How cool is that?

As of the writing of this blog, I've got to see the following places:

January 1 - The Cliffs, Negril, Jamaica
January 2 - Mesa Verde, Colorado, USA
January 3 - The Louvre, Paris, France

I can scratch January, 1 & 3 off of my list. One more thing that I can report is that the pictures on the calendar don't do each place any justice, at all. Don't get me wrong, the pictures are awesome, but trust me, you have to see each place for yourself...sometime in your lifetime.

This is a picture from my last visit to Cliff's Bar & Grill in Negril. I was last there in 2007.

Out With the Old and In With 2009

There is a saying that all good things must come to an end and so the time comes when we must all say goodbye to 2008. I am looking forward to all that 2009 has to offer. I cant say that the path is entirely clear, but I am exicted to make the journey.

To you and yours, all the best in the new year.

Dreams Realized

Went to Indy this weekend and saw Danny. I am happy to report that he is happy and doing well. He has settled in well with his girlfriend. Their new home is cute and rather cozy. One thing that struck me during my visit is that Danny is happy as a lark. He is happy because he is living and he is living well. Living well does not mean that he is swimming in money (although in this economy he isnt doing badly). He is living well because he is happy by simply being and doing what he loves to do. So many people can only dream of being so lucky.

I promised to return soon for another visit. I've already worked it out. I'll be back when it isnt so cold.

And So...

It has finally hit me that I can only control my actions and that I can not control the actions of others. Did you say, "Duh"? I mean in my head I knew this, but I didnt really know it until it hit me while I was running past South River Colony this morning during the Cold Turkey 10K. I was running and I heard another runner tell her running partner (I will assume a friend), "Honey, you can only control your own feet. Another person cant make you go any faster or slower. Only you can do that." I adjusted my head phones and ran past the both of them. The words you can only control your own feet stayed with me until I got to the last 100 yards and made the mad dash to the finish line.

Thank you fellow runner for helping me understand that:
1. I can control how fast I go.
2. I can only control my reactions to Mom and Dad's behavior during Thanksgiving Dinner. I will ask them to leave their usual antics at the door and pray that they do.
3. I can control my reaction to DK at work. I will choose to close my ears to all things negative that comes from him.
4. I can only control my reactions to Michael. I will choose to speak up and if it doesn't work...move on.
5. I can always count on me because I can guarantee that I'll be fine.
6. I can only control my behavior and not the behavior of others.

And so I've come to understand that one more of those metaphors about running and life is true. Thanks, my fellow runner, where ever you are this afternoon. BTW: I finished this 10K a whole 9 minutes faster than my 10K time during the Marathon. We-Hee!

I Never Thought I Would Live to See the Day

As a kid I use hear kids like me say, "I wanna be President when I grow up." You always responded with "of course", but in your heart, you really didn't believe it. Last night, the world got to witness history in the making. Now when little kids say, "I wanna be President." I can really say (and believe), "Yes! You can!"

I marveled at the elation of the people in this country. I mean who would have ever imagined people dancing in the streets in front of The White House? What really has left me speechless is the celebration of people from around the world.

I am proud! I am excited! I have lived to see America renew the hopes of its promise.

I Can Tell the Next Generation...

That I did my part in the historic 2008 Election! There was no line. I was in and out in less than 10 minutes. But I had to take stock of all the parents that had their children with them. They all wanted to be the example that their children would one day emulate (we can all hope). It was really wonderful to see.

No matter which side you are on, I hope that you went out and let your voices be heard.

On This Evening...A List

1. Alton Brown's new show Feasting on Waves is now a favorite of mine.
2. I have less than 6 weeks to go until the Marine Corps Marathon.
3. Life, for me, is indeed a cycle. I have lost touch with a second set of my married friends. Unlike the first group, I am not that hurt.
4. I am physically strong. My knew motto is: Better, Stronger, Faster.
5. My new addiction is local wines. I am really digging this Pennsylvania wine called Liberty White. Yummy!
6. I am bored with teaching. I am mortified that I am even able to utter the words.
7. I love learning. It doesn't matter what it is, learning is just plane old fun.
8. I am a closet style & fashion junkie.
9. Laughing is indeed the best medicine.
10. God has given me many blessings and I am grateful.
11. I have come to detest people that are without honor.
12. I am at peace doing quiet and solitary things.

That is all.